I honestly don’t know why I even bother.
As some of you may know, my in-laws are extremely difficult people.
In the past few days I have felt compelled to send them photos of oliver, even a video, and I even encouraged Kelvin to facechat with them with the little dude. (Things I never do.)
And what do I get for being polite and including them in my life? Well my mother in law told my husband that
MIL “OLIVER HAS NO HAIR!”
HUSBAND “YES HE DOES! HE HAS A LOT OF HAIR!”
MIL “WHAT COLOR IS IT?!”
HUSBAND “IT’S BROWN”
MIL “OLIVER. OLIVER. OLIVER, Y DON’T YOU HAVE BLACK HAIR LIKE US? OLIVER GROW SOME BLACK HAIR! PLEASE, OLIVER, GROW SOME BLACK HAIR”
Meanwhile I am sitting in front of my husband listening to this unfold… I even snapped my finger at my husband and gave him a death stare. And FYI- I am Caucasian and they are Chinese. God forbid my little half asian child resemble his white mama in a single way! Oh and if that wasn’t enough to completely offend me beyond belief I just got an email that sure as hell makes me want to write them off the face of the earth!
So, I swear- I’m not just a hateful in-law hater. There are reasons. My brother in law is an adult male who is 6’1” and 200+ lbs, he also happens to have fragile X syndrome and is extremely aggressive and volatile towards children. He is dangerous. My son isn’t going to be around him anymore, because we have had too many close encounters. Despite this, they still bought a condo here without our knowledge so they could come out more and more without ever asking if we were comfortable being around a potentially dangerous situation whenever they are here.
Which brings me to what happened tonight. My husband finally sent them an email that said that they should come out one by one, solo, without my brother in law during the winter months so they could actually help us out while they are here and watch Oliver. It took a lot of guts for him to finally tell them this, implying that uncle is not welcome out here during our busy season because we don’t have enough time to chauffeur them around and monitor uncle’s reactions. I was so happy. It was what I had wanted. Then I get this reply, and as usual- these asian in laws have apparently neglected to read anything my husband wrote and they’ve got some ideas of their very own!
“If you would consider OK, we can also have Oliver in Houston for a couple of weeks including connecting front and back weekends during your busiest time. You can see that we would be able to get more support at our end. Labor force is a lot more available here. If necessary, we can hire a live-in helper to stay with Oliver at Havendale. So our level of help can be more meaningful and not all on my energy level singly.
Anyway, I’m completely open. Let me know what works best for you.”
While reading this I just about nearly had a heart attack! To which I read to my husband and he said “WHAT THE FUCK! ABSOLUTELY NO!”
Um yea. SO I am in full blown crazy inlaw mode again. yay. FML.